Can Broken-hearted Parents Find Victory?

by | Jan 9, 2023 | what you can do | 4 comments

photo cred. kristina tripkovic on unsplash

My daughter was on the brink of disaster. Defeated, helplessness overwhelmed me. I get forgot how far I’d already come as the mother of a young adult daughter who had many serious problems. All I could see was how far there still was to go for her to recover. Many of you can relate. Addiction, mental illness, self-harm, sexual identity (including pornography and promiscuity), and eating disorders ruin lives. They can drain the life out of your child and crush the life out of you as you watch them drift away, not knowing if they will survive.

Give us aid against the enemy (fear, worry, doubt, unbelief, expectations, self-effort, hopelessness, despair, depression) for the help of man is worthless.   With God we will gain the victory and he will trample down our enemies (Psalms 108:12-13 NIV).

I am always encouraged when I read this verse in the Bible. When I begin to wonder if finding victory really is possible trurn to this passage. New hope is found. Like a breath of fresh air when I feel like I’m suffocating, I gasp for it. I take the words deep into my spiritual lungs.

What does victory look like for us? Will it mean all of our child’s problems are solved? Will we have perfect peace all the time? No more trouble or conflict? Everything works out the way we want and hope for? Our dreams come true? Our child is fixed and in recovery; they’re physically, emotionally and spiritually healthy? Oh how wonderful this would be.

Dear friend, brace yourself. Victory probably won’t look like this.

What am I saying? Have I lost my hope or my faith? Do I doubt God’s power to do miracles of healing and deliverance? No! By all means, no.

I propose that we can have victory in the midst of our problems. In our troubles. In our storms. In the dark, even if things don’t work out. Even if our prayers are not answered. Even if our child is never “fixed”.

Let me draw your attention to what I believe are the key words in Psalms 108:12-13.

With God.

With God we will gain the victory.

With God we will trample down our enemies.

God will give us aid.

Our victory is with Him and in Him and from Him and through Him. And in His Son, Jesus Christ. Through faith in Him. Trusting His power and ability to help us.

photo cred. Zachary Olson on Unsplash

There’s an old hymn I remember singing about our victory in Jesus. The title is “Victory in Jesus”. A beautiful older woman I knew many years ago loved to sing this hymn in our small church. I think this was her theme song. And another old hymn I remember speaks about faith being the victory that overcomes the world. The title of that one is “Faith is the Victory”. The dictionary defines victory as “an act of winning or state of having won a battle or any kind of struggle.”

That’s a perfect description, isn’t it? You and I are in a battle — a spiritual one — for our sanity. We desperately need to win for the sake of our own well-being. We’re also in a battle for the lives and souls of our beloved children. Oh how we long to win that one too.

The victory I’ve experienced in my struggle has been found in accessing God’s power, strength, and ability to replace my weakness, and inability with His. Victory is how God shows up in my trials and enables me to walk through them with faith and trust.

Here are a few more Bible verses I like on this subject:

Psalm 44: 5-8  “Through you we push back our enemies, through your name we trample our foes.  I do not trust in my bow, my sword does not bring me victory; but You give us victory . . . in God we will make our boast all day long.”

I Corinthians 15:54, 57  ” . . . death has been swallowed up in victory . . . but thanks be to God!  He gives us the victory through our Lord Jesus Christ.”

I John 5:5  “This is the victory that has overcome the world (all our enemies) . . . our faith.”


  1. liane ingram

    I needed this right now. Thank you so much for this post today and for this site altogether. God bless you as you have blessed me.

  2. denayohe

    Thank you for your comment. I am so glad it helped you and I hope you will find more encourag
    ement here!

  3. Nic

    Thank you so much! Your words touched me perfectly! Your website is one of my first stops in times of difficulty and desperation.

    • Tom and Dena Yohe

      Nic, it is a real blessing to hear how much my words help you and that our website is a source for you when you need it.
      Blessings of peace and hope to you this Easter week.